Decaffeination, Day 1
It's been 31 hours since my last dose of caffeine. Right now, I feel pretty good, save for a slight headache. The rest of the day was another matter.
My thoughts flowed slowly, like pouring honey on a cold day. It felt like thick, invisible gauze was pressing down on my eyes, both weighing down my eyelids and putting a barrier between myself and the world. I couldn't focus and often caught myself just staring off into space. I lacked any physical energy and when I went for a short bike ride, I ended up winded.
On top of all that, I was craving sweets like a mofo. Seriously. Eating cherry jam out of a jar with a spoon while standing at the fridge kind of craving. I ate half of a huge block of white chocolate. Got ice cream on the way back from the bike ride and then, post-dinner, went out and got New York Super Fudge Chunk. It's not that I'm hungry - I didn't eat that much real food today - it's just sweets. If it's sweet, put it in mah MOUTH!
Why am I doing this, you may ask. I'm doing it because I've had recent health problems (read: occasional gut wrenching stomach pain) that are likely exacerbated by my caffeine consumption. At the same time, I realized a couple of years ago that the level of anxiety I experience, day-to-day, is higher than average and recently realized that my caffeine consumption probably makes it worse. Plus, I've always just wondered what it would be like to be completely drug free.
I'm doing it cold turkey because I want to experience, fully, just how addicted I am to this drug. And let me tell you, I'm feeling it.
My thoughts flowed slowly, like pouring honey on a cold day. It felt like thick, invisible gauze was pressing down on my eyes, both weighing down my eyelids and putting a barrier between myself and the world. I couldn't focus and often caught myself just staring off into space. I lacked any physical energy and when I went for a short bike ride, I ended up winded.
On top of all that, I was craving sweets like a mofo. Seriously. Eating cherry jam out of a jar with a spoon while standing at the fridge kind of craving. I ate half of a huge block of white chocolate. Got ice cream on the way back from the bike ride and then, post-dinner, went out and got New York Super Fudge Chunk. It's not that I'm hungry - I didn't eat that much real food today - it's just sweets. If it's sweet, put it in mah MOUTH!
Why am I doing this, you may ask. I'm doing it because I've had recent health problems (read: occasional gut wrenching stomach pain) that are likely exacerbated by my caffeine consumption. At the same time, I realized a couple of years ago that the level of anxiety I experience, day-to-day, is higher than average and recently realized that my caffeine consumption probably makes it worse. Plus, I've always just wondered what it would be like to be completely drug free.
I'm doing it cold turkey because I want to experience, fully, just how addicted I am to this drug. And let me tell you, I'm feeling it.
Labels: anxiety, caffeine, health, withdrawal
posted by Sam at 1:46 AM
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